(Sorry I’m a week late on this but you know…. Kids, a baby, life, it all got in the way –as it should!)
Today was the reverse of yesterday; our morning was hectic and our evening was less stressful. My plan of attack happened to work, we remedied the colic and coped much better. My current go-to remedy in the evenings is to diffuse Poofy Organic’s Frankincense essential oil.
Back to my day: We had a play date planned with a group of new moms and kids we had never met. It was a further drive than the baby wanted and when we came to an abrupt stop on a bad car accident it caused him to scream out in protest. A heart wrenching, blood curdling cry because how dare the car stop moving?!? I could’ve felt sorry for myself but instead I took a few deep cleansing breaths and started humming, nothing in particular just humming. I took myself out of the stress mentally so I could cope without whining and letting the negative overwhelm my senses. We arrived to the get together and had a great time.
I must say though, there is something about being around other moms, you tend to commiserate and bond over all the tough, awkward, messy things moms have to do day in and day out. Is that complaining? Probably, but it was productive in a sense that we were smiling about it and creating a dialogue about what motherhood really looks and feels like. We talked about potty training and naps, the good and the bad, and we learned we weren’t alone in our struggles or our joys. I guess there is a time and place where complaining briefly may be beneficial in some fashion. Venting is a tricky business. I will try to not get caught up in it for too long.
So what did I learn through all of this… I learned how much our society is accustomed to complaining, venting, bad mouthing and general negative self-talk on a daily basis. Sarcasm is engrained in our speech and self-pity is heavily present. Life is rough. It’s stressful and we don’t know how to channel that stress; whether it’s anger, sadness, worry, or what, we verbalize it and give it power. Our kid won’t sleep so we whine. The boss keeps nagging so we vent. It doesn’t solve the problem, it only occupies more of our day with the issue we despise most to begin with, whatever is stressing is out. I hope to channel my complaints into physical means via exercise in the future. If I can’t do that I will aim for creativity. I want to turn the negative into a positive by doing something productive instead of destructive.
I said before that complaining as an adult is tantamount to a toddler having a tantrum; We won’t always get our way in life and we need to train ourselves to be okay with it. Really be okay with it. If we can, maybe happiness will be easier to attain and maintain.